Which Of These 3 Decision-Making Types Are You?
Love them or hate them, decisions are part of life. There are so many, you might not even notice you’re making them. What you’ll have for lunch, whether you’ll go to that party, what day you’ll meet your bestie for lunch. What to wear and whether to take your umbrella when you go out. We make decisions all the time.
When it comes to weightier decisions, people’s decision-making styles become apparent. Obviously, choosing the house you’ll buy or a job from two or more offers will have a significant impact on your life for the foreseeable future, so it’s natural to pay more attention.
Some people will just wade in and confidently pick one option. Others hate having to decide.
I’ve identified 3 main decision-making types that all come with advantages and disadvantages. In the following, I’ll guide you through a test to figure out which type you belong to. I’ll give you steps to counteract each type’s drawbacks, and then list a few practical techniques that’ll help you make the right decision a breeze.
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Find “your type”
To identify which of the three “types” you belong to, find the answer that matches what you would do most closely and take a note of the letter (a, b or c) associated with it.
You and two friends decide to order a “party” snack platter or fingerfood for 3.
a) You find the best option on the menu and point out to the others that this is what you should get.
b) You glance at the menu and go: “Oh, whatever. You choose whatever you fancy. I’m not picky!”
c) You hog the menu for several minutes, read every description closely and weigh them up in your head. Then you let the others decide but secretly wish they’d picked something different.
You need to move house. Two apartments are suitable, neither of them ideal, but they’re your only options and they’ll do.
a) You assess their price, location, and features, sleep on it and then decide for one.
b) You wish there were better options and that you didn’t have to do this. Eventually, you pick the one you felt more comfortable in when viewing it.
c) Your thoughts revolve around it, you can’t get it out of your head and constantly check the property websites to see if something else has come to market. Eventually, one of your options is taken by someone else.
Your relationship isn’t great, and hasn’t been for a while.
a) You talk to your partner, consider couples therapy, set yourself a time by when you’ll figure out whether to stay together or separate.
b) You use hints and the way you act to get your partner to either leave or affirm that they’re committed to the relationship. If nothing happens, you eventually snap and call it quits.
c) You talk to your friends about it, read self-help books on relationships, and end up emotionally burnt out six months later.
Decision making types and how to work with them
Here are the types as they correspond to the letters in the above test. Two or three answers with the same letter indicate strongly that this is your decision-making type. If you picked a different letter each time, you might be a mix between them.
Letter a: The Executive
People of this type have no trouble making decisions. They weigh up facts and their feelings about them, see the pros and cons, and act. If you’re an Executive, you make decisions quickly and then stop thinking about them. This is a great skill to have.
Drawback: The only thing you should be aware of is a tendency to move too fast at times. Some decisions have long-term consequences and deserve to be mulled over for a while. Consulting trusted friends or advisors might also broaden your perspective.
Letter b: The Mood Ring
You neither love nor hate decisions. Since you’re a fairly laid-back person, you often genuinely don’t mind which option is picked. Therefore, you tend to leave deciding to others, or go with your emotions at the time.
Drawback: Emotions can be a good guide in decisions, but basing decisions on your present mood, rather than logical arguments, can backfire. You may end up in an awful job just because you enjoyed talking to the person who interviewed you.
Letter c: The Quicksand
Decisions are a nightmare to you. Whenever possible, you try to avoid them or pass them on to others, which works well as long as they’re reliable people with your best interests in mind. You also don’t take important decisions lightly.
Drawback: The thing is, you can’t really avoid decisions. Trying to do so will often get you stuck with the worst option by default. Work on acquiring the necessary skills and confidence to make good decisions, and take a look at the techniques I recommend below.
How to make your decisions easier and/or better
No matter which type you are, you can always improve and hone your decision-making skills. Here are a few things that will help.
First of all, realise that no decision is also a decision (as I pointed out above, regarding the “Quicksand” type). Trying to avoid a decision, is a decision. If you drag out the “should I stay or should I go” situation in a relationship, you’re deciding to stay unfulfilled and unhappy.
Another insight is that there are no, or very few, “wrong” decisions. Sure, you might regret taking the job when it turns out to be too stressful after a while. But you know what? You can change jobs again! Most decisions aren’t irreversible. Besides, they may lead to experiences or people that’ll make it worthwhile. Trust this.
If you’re the type to make decisions quickly or based on your mood, try out not to act on impulse too much. Your decision should be based on something more solid than whether you got out of bed on the wrong foot that day. Here are two guideposts you can always rely on:
Be aware of your core values (find your five values on this list) and make sure your decision is aligned with them.
Also align your decisions with your goals. It helps if you have them written down and review them regularly!
Decision-making techniques for everyone
The good old pros and cons list can be useful, but there are other ways to help along a decision. Warning: The following might actually be fun!
The pendulum
This might sound esoteric, but what actually moves a pendulum is subtle, unconscious motions of your hand. It’s a great way to access your inner wisdom.
Use a necklace and pendant or tie a ring to a piece of string and write down your options in the shape of a half-circle, on a piece of paper. With your elbow propped up, hold the pendulum over the paper until it begins to swing, indicating one of your options.
Body Feedback
This is great when you have a big, scary decision ahead. Sit down and become calm, breathe deeply. Then think of the big thing you want to do. It’ll probably scare the living daylights out of you, but focus on the feeling in your stomach area.
Does it feel scary in a fluttery way, a bit like butterflies? Or does your stomach knot up? In other words: Does it feel expansive or restrictive? There’s your answer.
Knock-out system
Write down all your options, then compare the first two and pick the more appealing one. Repeat until you’re left with the winning option.
At this point, one of two things will happen: You’ll either be relieved that you’ve found your decision, or you’ll feel very clearly that you actually want something else. In either case, you’ll know what to do.
Try these and see which ones suit you. You can make them a regular practice. Decision making is like a muscle that needs to be used regularly to stay strong. Make sure yours is buff!