Abstract:

I love talking about slowing down and downsizing. I also read a lot about the subject.

Again and again in these books, I come across the idea that life is simply too short to settle for “not too bad” or “okay”. It can be comforting for a moment – hey, my life is okay, I’m not unhappy. But it also means that you’re settling.

Your mission is to find out what you’ll no longer settle for.
  

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Task 1: What are you settling for?

One of my musical idols, Janis Joplin, once said: “You are what you settle for, you know?” And she would know.

Janis was a woman in a male-dominated industry, and she was unique – bold, loud, demanding, rather than small, pretty, and coquettish. She simply refused to settle for her assigned role as a woman.

This implies two things: That settling is a choice, and that it’s a choice that society expects us to make. It’s a struggle to refuse and requires a lot of courage and energy. Therefore, let yourself off the hook if you realise you’ve been settling.

Your task is to look at your life and determine in what areas you’re less than outrageously happy and fulfilled. Note them down.

Task 2: The time of your life

One of those books I’ve been reading is “4000 weeks” by Oliver Burkeman. The central idea in this book is that during an average lifetime, we only have 4000 weeks.

Considering this, it takes on a new urgency to stop settling for things. How many more of your 4000 weeks will you spend waiting for the right time to make changes?

Look at what you wrote down in Task 1. Now decide how you will use the remaining time of your life. Will you continue settling? Or are you going to make changes?

If you decide for the latter, don’t try to change everything at once; rather, pick one thing to start with, and take action. Get help from a coach or a good friend, because this won’t be easy. However, it’ll be worth it!