Why You’re Not Who You Think You Are

Abstract:

Apologies for the in-your-face title. Who am I to tell you what you think about yourself is wrong?

Well, actually, I do have grounds for this, because I work with a lot of people and I see how widespread these misconceptions about oneself are. Still, what I’m saying might not apply to you – it’s not a universal truth. Therefore, judge for yourself.

Your mission today is to learn why you might not be who you think you are, and what to do to fully become who you are.
 

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Task 1: Why aren’t you who you think you are?

We tend to think that we know best who we are. To a certain extent, this is definitely true. Nobody else can tell us what to do or what we want.

And yet we don’t always see the picture clearly. We tend to identify with what feels familiar about ourselves. It feels right and true because it’s been with us for a long time.

But what if not all of this is our true self? We all get conditioned by our families, schools, peers, by the way we grow up. Some people are deeply traumatised, something that’s been imposed upon them.

This also means that who we truly are, might actually feel wrong.

Little girl sitting by a window

Task 2: Learn who you truly are

So how can you tell who you truly are, especially if it feels wrong? There’s a process to this, and it can take some time and get messy, but here are the basic steps:

  • Heal what needs to be healed. Think of it as unlearning what other people tried to make you.

  • Remember your earliest dreams and wishes. What were your dreams and daydreams like as a child?

  • Explore your passion(s). Passions say something about you on a very deep level.

Knowing who you are also makes it easier to say no when something is not aligned with your true being. It might be a journey, but it’s worth the effort.

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