Overcome Laziness Easily, Once And For All
When I brainstormed and researched the material for this article, I had the amusing thought that I may as well offer an abridged version saying:
You’re not, in fact, lazy. Done, bye!
There’s some truth to this, but as usual, it’s not quite as simple. First of all, the lack of motivation you’re experiencing, is real (or maybe you’re motivated all right, but don’t manage to translate this into action). It doesn’t matter if this concerns self improvement, exercise, or doing something you love – it sucks.
Because you can see that there’s time left in your day, you don’t see any possible explanation, other than laziness. In this article, I’ll explore the true reason for your struggles. You may have heard me say that I don’t believe laziness exists.
I don’t want to leave it at that, though, because knowing the answer isn’t enough. Instead, I’ll also give you steps to take towards turning this around, so that this time, you won’t stay stuck in the planning stage.
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Why are you “lazy”? Peeling back the layers
When I was a child in the 70s and then a teenager in the 80s, TV was blamed for people’s sedentary lifestyle and lack of motivation, and nowadays, it’s the internet. In fact, modern media are certainly contributing factors and need to be addressed and managed, but they’re not the root of the problem.
Then in recent years, a lot has been written about the emotional toll the pandemic and now the war in Europe has taken on many people. People are mentally and emotionally exhausted, especially since there seems to be no end to the challenges, even now in their fourth year.
Add to that the physical challenges many are facing, such as long-term effects of Covid that millions still struggle with – myself included – and it’s easy to see why psychologists sound the alarm. These, too, are very real and significant contributing factors to many people’s lack of motivation.
However, the way I see it, all these things are only exacerbating a much larger and more universal problem. It’s been around for much longer than the pandemic and even social media. It’s only because these factors make it so much worse, that we’re now collectively close to breaking point. They’re the proverbial straw that breaks the camel’s back.
The root cause
Now I’ll come to the root cause, and this is where many will stop reading, or simply think: ‘Oh, that’s interesting – but it doesn’t apply to me. My case is different.’ I invite you to keep reading with an open mind, because you may be surprised to find yourself in the rest of this article, after all.
The cause for your “laziness”, either from lack of motivation or lack of putting something you really want to do, into action, is: You’re doing too much.
I can practically hear the collective outcry: “No, that’s not it! I’m not doing much at all! I do have time, or I would have if I didn’t waste it.” And so forth.
I repeat: You’re doing too much.
Of course, there are mental health impairments that come with executive dysfunction, which means that people are often incapable of doing much at all, even though they want to. That’s not what I’m talking about here, though (and even if it was: executive dysfunction has nothing to do with laziness, either).
You see, it’s not so much about how hard you’re working, but how many different things occupy your mind.
I’ve written about the way we try to be everything and do it all these days. We work relentlessly and daily and are expected to expend all our energy, attention and devotion at our jobs. We do our own grocery shopping, prepare our own meals, do all the household chores, look after our families, exercise.
As well, we remember people’s birthdays, attend meetings and gatherings, try to go to the occasional party/wedding/dinner with friends, and if there’s any time left, we try – often unsuccessfully – to squeeze in some self care or, Heaven forbid, hobbies/passions/interests.
You’re doing too much.
The right balance
Never before in history did humans play every role, all the time. Work was more seasonal, with long periods of idleness in between, rather than by the clock and with set hours. Never before has one person seriously tried to be employee, leader, housewife/-husband, nanny, athlete, yogi, cook, driver and gardener all at the same time.
It doesn’t matter whether one or more of the above roles don’t apply to your life. If you have any more than two of them, it’s too much.
You’re supposed to rest and be idle, regularly and for longer stretches of time. Instead, we expect to be occupied every minute of every day. Add to this the distractions of modern media and other exacerbating circumstances I described above, and you have a toxic mixture.
Yes, there are free times in your day, but that doesn’t mean that you should be able to just jump in and exercise/be productive/be creative or whatever else you expect from yourself. That’s not how human beings are designed.
Most of us don’t know anything else. We’ve been doing too much, trying to do even more, and feeling guilty about failing at it, for so long that we think it’s normal. Besides, everyone around us is doing the same thing.
How to turn it around
The process of basically becoming a pre-modern human again, is going to take some time. You’ll face resistance, from others and most of all, from your own, brainwashed mind. You’ll feel guilty and inept. If you persist, though, you’ll feel your laziness evaporating and suddenly be full of energy and motivation to do exactly what you mean to.
Here are the 3 steps:
Do less. By this, I mean fewer things. You can’t be the boss of every area in your life. Focus on what’s important, kick out what’s superfluous, and outsource the rest. This may involve changing your job, finding a cleaner for your house, cancelling memberships, stepping down from committees, leaving online communities or social media.
Whatever it takes, do a lot less. Don’t think of it as “doing without” or “having to give things up”. This is about enhancing your one, precious life by focusing on the things that make you happy.
Learn to rest. Take up meditation. Do nothing. Keep at it, and keep practising. Remember, it’s going to feel awkward for some time; all new things do. Persist.
Find support because it’s hard to create change on your own. Talk to me or any coach you resonate with; enlist the help of friends and family. You’re going to need everyone in your corner, or you’ll simply slip back into your own habits.
The reward will be a life that’s less busy, but filled with meaning - “meaning-full”. It’ll involve never having to kick yourself into doing something you love any more. Your work and relationships are going to improve and you’ll finally no longer feel like your life is on auto-pilot.
Ask yourself: What would that be worth to you?